"Change is only good if it is in the RIGHT direction."
--Winston Churchill
This is the blog of an ordinary married couple who seem to have difficulty in being ordinary. Please join us as we laugh at ourselves and contemplate this world that we live in.

Contemplation

I am not sure what exactly has triggered this state of contemplation that I am finding myself in. Likely it is related to moving somewhere new, working insane hours, and actually having the end of 12 year of college/training coming to an official end next year.


I find myself remembering why I went into medicine in the first place and how I desperately believed that I could make a difference in people's lives. I hope that is still the case; however, it is so hard not to become jaded and believe that everyone in pain wants to sell narcotics on the street and knowing that even though you spend 30 minutes giving discharge instructions to a patient they may not follow through with anything that you are recommending resulting in a readmission later that same week. It is so hard not to become frustrated and worn out. I remember thinking that money matter very little to me and as long as I was practicing medicine in a capacity that I loved the amount of money that I made would be beside the point. Now that my medical school loans are looming in front of me it is hard to remember that desire. I find myself thinking is it possible to still make decent money and work only part-time? I am exhausted.

Have you ever sat down and truly thought about what you are doing with your life and where you believe God is leading you? These are the things that have been heavy on my heart lately. These are the goals that I have for my life--some generic, some specific, and in no particular order.

1. Serve my Savior daily
2. Continue in a long, happy marriage
3. Live out my dreams and not just make lists :)
4. Segment hike the AT (much more realistic for me)
5. Visit ALL the National Parks
6. Live a quiet, simple life in the country surrounded by those I love
7. Medical Missions: preferably long term missions
8. Raise children that love the Lord
9. Value people and time more than money and things
10. Deliver babies into the world, hold the hands of those dying, and all that lies in between with the Lord's blessing on my judgment and his name on my lips. Pray with my patients and pray for my patients.

I apologize if this is an odd post but I must say that there is something therapeutic about writing this all out. Thanks for listening!

2 comments:

Amy said...

Sarah,
It was great reading this! Thanks for sharing. This world can be such a hard place to live in--all the time! You have a loaded job-may His Word light your path.

In Christ,
Rudy

The DeVries' said...

Great heart Sar--that's why so many people love you. I am glad you are being pro-active about your life---I am glad you are in the field you are in---and I am glad to know you and be your friend! :)

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